Sheryl Crow needs a glowing vagina

Sheryl Crow knows what she needs to further her career – a glowing vagina.

In an interview with Vanity Fair magazine, the singer was told that ‘the big thing now for female singers is glowing vaginas. Christina Aguilera performed a song on the [MTV Movie Awards], and at the end the camera zoomed in on her crotch, and it was a flashing neon heart.’

‘Wow,’ Sheryl replied. ‘I don’t even know what to say. How do I miss out on some of this stuff?’

‘I had no idea you could have a glowing vagina. Is it too late for me to get one of those? And would it help my record sales?’

‘As soon as we hang up, I’m going to check it out and see where I can get a glowing vagina. I have a record coming out, I don’t want people to think my vagina isn’t glowing.’